Monthly Archives: August 2014

My ‘Naked’ Run

As I was running one day, consumed at the start with the uncertainties life had presented to me I began to imagine shedding my mental and emotional hindrances as though I were undressing, leaving a trail of clothing behind me.

So, I hung my doubts on the post of the split-rail fence and tossed my sadness and disappointments into the welcoming marsh.  All of my fear, uncertainty and hopelessness I laid directly on the nearby railroad tracks and waited for the rush of the morning train to sweep them afar. The three startled deer carried away all of my unmet expectations and the spiders’ webs caught the deepest longings of my heart. Under the gnarly roots of the moss-covered trees I buried my brokenness. The less traveled, overgrown path is now paved with my haunting insecurities and the river it leads to now overflow the banks with every tearful heartache I endure.  All of my worries, cares and encumbering concerns I imagined melting in the heat of this Florida summertime run and disappearing off my mind and heart like the salty sweat dripping from my skin. At the trails end, I envisioned the raw honesty of an emotionally unhindered, bare-naked heart and soul, now stripped of the wrappings of worry and once again fresh, pure and free to move along without encumbrance.

Each of us learns to cope with life’s challenges one way or another. But sometimes we use escape methods to ignore their reality. We delay their resolve by keeping busy. We deny their presence, resisting the need for change. We defer responsibility, hoping someone else will remedy them for us or we detach emotionally in order to painlessly survive. Sometimes, we dismiss our emotional burdens apathetically, as if we are powerless.

Or, as painful as it may be, we learn to take ownership of them. We decide to respond by allowing those challenges, feelings and uncertainties to surface, accepting their reality and reconciling them to our lives. Then, we may freely let go, shedding those hindrances, like a trail of discarded clothing, embracing the Divine renewal of a fresh start, returning to the natural, unashamed and free spirit our soul was meant to run. Oh, the freedom, the sweet relief and the cleansing power, of  a naked run! -PS©2014

Advertisements

4 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Wanted

I want to live a meaningful, purposeful and intentional life without regret. I want to grow deeper in understanding and insight. I want to discover and apply wisdom. I want to shelf worry, rest in hope, experience adventure and laugh away my life’s struggle without fear.

I want to unmask the irony, reject the hypocrisy and disregard the foolishness that creeps into my life. I want to make daily choices, no matter how painful, that demonstrate a genuine proof of commitment and belief without contradiction.

I want to be defined by the good I wanted and the continual seeking after it – not by the way I have failed, fretted and feared along the way.  I want the lessons learned in life to lift my chin with courage and reveal that same assuring confidence known in the intimate, eye connecting moments between lovers, that all is not lost and I am not alone on this journey.

I know that ‘wanting’ it is not enough. It is my choice. And though I am far from having everything I want, and even in times of temptation and weakness, refuse what I really want with a casual and selfish ‘no-thank you’ –there is still hope, hope for enough strength, forgiveness and fresh starts from a God who wants it for me as well, and even more than I.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized